Fetish

Fetish Flow
I am walking through the streets of London in October. It is daytime and the shade is a little cool beside the high buildings blocking the sun but better here than in the direct heat of its rays. I feel the perspiration on my skin slightly chill and collect beneath the fabric of my costume and run in a rivulet of sweat trickling down my torso. I enjoy the sensation. I straighten my posture slightly to make myself a little more comfortable but also a little more in keeping with my appearance, it makes me a tad aloof and look just a little silly. I am careful where I place my feet on the ill maintained pavements, in these heels I could fall any moment and this would destroy the illusion of my act. I raise my left arm so it crooks at the elbow and arrange my fingers in such a way that each digit is given its own poised position.
Up ahead is Big Ben and the Houses of Parliament, the seat of power is spread before me with all the statues that represent my country’s history and its struggle for democracy, its struggle with its own people to establish a balance between state interference in the lives of individuals to culture a singular stable society that will be instrumental in providing the overall means of achieving the personal desires of the state in exchange for social welfare that in itself must accommodate the diversity of individual freedoms for self-expression as demanded by the subjects of this monarch realm. I practice this conviction that I am free under the law to do as I do without prejudice. I enjoy testing this conviction.
All around people are stopping and turning and looking at me. I am after all in my Sunday best so I expect to receive a little attention. Their faces smile, their faces are bemused, and their faces are excited. I can sense their heart rate beat a little faster as what they perceive to be coming towards them throws up a million and one questions. What are they seeing? Who are they seeing? Why do they appear as they do? Is it right or is it wrong? Will harm come to us? I smile and nod and bow and curtsey my way through the crowds to acknowledge I am no threat, that I am ephemeral and gentle to their lives. It is not my intention to cause distressing disruption to their safe worlds, to throw their mind into chaotic uncertainty that may initiate flight or fight reactions in everyone, but rather to open their eyes to my unusualness yet still be approachable so they may come to interact and familiarise themselves to my existence, my presence in their existence. I impose a little disorder in their lives but I hope to seem friendly enough so that when order is re-established in their minds then what I represent can be slotted in with re-evaluated appreciation through the experience. Those who choose to ignore me or who are blissfully happy in their own little world I have no intention of imposing myself upon, I note their number all the same however, but I am here especially for those who seek a little magic in their lives.
A collection of people approach me directly and I come to a halt. I have to listen closely as their voices are muffled through the material that covers my ears. What I hear is mainly background city din, squelching and sucking of moisture in my ears and my own breath. I watch their lips as they speak and make out wonderful compliments to my dress and requests for photos. I am not here to refuse this little pleasure, indeed this is the sole purpose for why I am here, so I nod and shape my words as best I can beneath the restrictions of the fabric that encase my face and pay attention to the timbre of my voice so that the only outward manifestation of who I am does not destroy the creation of my costumed personae.
It is not easy but after we all pose for a quick snap of the camera I try to answer that one person who asks me that wonderful question “why”. Why am I as I am? It is a question larger than they could realise and my answers are not always the same. Sometimes I will say it is for fun, other times I will say because I can, because I am allowed, and other times I will say because we all have a purpose in life to find inside us something amazing and to share this quality with the world, to show to others that we can do this, and to thank the world for the opportunity to reveal it. But I never answer fully why I do what I do, that I do it for the ‘flow’.
Suddenly a bus drives by and I catch a reflection of myself in its windows. For the briefest of moments I cannot breath and stand in awe at what I see. There is my dream; there is the ultimate desirable object in the whole wide world, and that object is me. I have become my fetish. Rubber adorns me from head to toe. My body is encased in a shear skin of black latex that nobody sees. This is my skin and to reveal it would be to show my nakedness. I am dressed in creamy white rubber trousers that flare at the bottom over my high heel and plat formed boots. I wear a pewter rubber blouse with poof shoulders and double breasted buttons down its front and the sleeves that end with shiny black tight gloves. Over the top of this I wear my black rubber discipline corset that squeezes in my waist to give me shapeliness and posture restraints that pull pack my shoulders and raise my prosthetic breasts. Straps at the bottom fasten under and around my crotch to refasten to the back of the corset. Then over the top of all this is a free flowing white cape style coat in the same creamy white rubber as the trousers. This cape fastens around the midriff of my torso and the neck with lacing. A glistening black latex hood covers my face. One eye that has a squint when I am not wearing my glasses is covered by a red and black skull and crossbones eye patch. The other eye and the lips, which are the only parts of my natural body to be seen, are enriched with luscious make-up. My round and beautifully domed head is crowned by a creamy white rubber hat. I am polished like some beautifully cared for mahogany table, the sun light glinting off my surface. I am dazzling. I am complete. I am refined. I am fashion. I am future. And I love myself. And this person stands above the crowds and hugs them all to its bosom.